Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
