If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
