i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
