Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Four minutes until I can fart!
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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