yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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