it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize