just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize