My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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