My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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