Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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