i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
