btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey