just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Less talking, more tequila
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
