it hurts more in the daytime
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have so much sex to catch up on
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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