Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
