She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
smell my finger.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
