i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
