did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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