rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
