idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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