I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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