Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
