ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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