How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
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