Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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