do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
