that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We had to coat check the pizza.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
