Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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