And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize