Michael Bay diarrhea
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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