im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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