She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
