dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
