just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Randomize
