I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
