Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
