he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
