Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
