It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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