Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried