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• (206): View more from Washington

  I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.

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• (956): View more from Texas

  im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"

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  29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.

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  21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.

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• (772): View more from Florida

  Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning

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• (518): View more from New York

  I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.

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• (+49): View more from Germany

  I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?

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