Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.

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  (415): The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight. http://tfl.nu/rmxq
  Replies (20) Good night (4077) Bad night (703)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"

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  (314): I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina" http://tfl.nu/4mpo
  Replies (14) Good night (3909) Bad night (1081)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.

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  (563): please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death. http://tfl.nu/862e
  Replies (10) Good night (1916) Bad night (3938)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.

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  (614): would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter. http://tfl.nu/c050
  Replies (4) Good night (2892) Bad night (752)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar

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  (406): Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar http://tfl.nu/9n3o
  Replies (6) Good night (1349) Bad night (587)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.

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  (850): His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend. http://tfl.nu/ofwy
  Replies (10) Good night (1804) Bad night (607)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now

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  (203): Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now http://tfl.nu/p7dd
  Replies (2) Good night (1307) Bad night (654)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  How external is "for external use only"?

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  (859): How external is "for external use only"? http://tfl.nu/650o
  Replies (16) Good night (759) Bad night (1343)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2

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  (206): I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2 http://tfl.nu/1blx
  Replies (9) Good night (1280) Bad night (534)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.

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  (803): Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard. http://tfl.nu/vzps
  Replies (8) Good night (731) Bad night (1325)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand

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  (931): I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand http://tfl.nu/pke8
  Replies (0) Good night (571) Bad night (338)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed

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  (613): So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed http://tfl.nu/pqem
  Replies (2) Good night (759) Bad night (280)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails

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  (703): I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails http://tfl.nu/g65f
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (501)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?

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  (508): How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster? http://tfl.nu/rbos
  Replies (1) Good night (243) Bad night (680)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text

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  (727): idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text http://tfl.nu/1tkt
  Replies (1) Good night (412) Bad night (191)

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