Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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