I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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