nut hugger
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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