this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
