talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize