we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
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he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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