Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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