great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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