I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I FOUND THE LEGS
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
