you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
